Formulaic fun

The festive season is creeping up on us and there feels like no escape. We can only hope that the weather is kind to the Scottish football grounds.

A few weeks ago the topic came up "what would you change about the scottish game". This wee serving of Paella and Bovril gives you an idea of what I thought.

What do you think?

This was first seen in the Programme of the Scottish Cup tie with Deveronvale on Saturday 1st December. Raith went thru to the next round with a 2-1 win

Paella and Bovril

It seems that every 5 minutes somebody somewhere wants to sweeten the Scottish game it by changing it’s structure. Mix this division with that league, add a dash of grass roots, stir them about and voila! -the perfect cocktail of football. Well that is what they keep promising to serve up to us.

What would give Scottish football the perfect flavour? Regional divisions or fewer teams, maybe bigger leagues; but what about the actual 90 minutes? On a recent broadcast of Off The Ball the question was asked, "If you could change one thing about Scottish football what would it be?" The usual answers came in; bring back standing areas, Saturday 3 o'clock games as standard, but a recent comment from my boyfriend made me think about something a bit different.

In our house we watch more than a bit of sport- American football, cycling, athletics and of course football. I am the bigger football fan and will watch most games till the death, even those tedious nil-nils. As I sat recently watching one of those classic 0-0 a voice of Glaswegian wisdom came from the other side of the sofa "nae points fir 0-0". After a bit more thought and lots of hand gesture-fueled discussions the idea started to develop. 

So in went the email to Off The Ball, expecting it to disappear into the ether, but whilst making a pre match cuppa on it came, “the one thing Carol in Barcelona would change in Scottish football is the points system.” The formula I gave to them is pretty simple in principle.

0-0 = 0 points

1-1 = 1 point

2-2  or more = 2 points

Win = 3 points

Lose = 0 points

Not your usual idea put forward to brighten up the game!

Under the current system, if we are honest, goals are a luxury! If both teams just pass the ball back and forth in the middle of the park they can leave the pitch with the one point they started the game with. No goals, no shots on target because if "we play it safe we get the point!" How many times have you as a fan heard from the journalist, or even thought yourselves that if we just hold on we will get the point. Or heard the manager excuse the umpteenth goalless draw by over-praising the clean sheet.  But if you start the game with no goals, why can’t you begin with no points. As soon as the game starts the teams HAVE to score if they want just a point, maybe this could give us attacking football from the off, from both sides!

Or how would the last ten minutes be if it really is all or nothing to play for. Imagine 80 minutes to go, nothing each, the prospect of no points, someone has to score, no one likes to go home with nothing, a goal is the only way to get a point, but who wants to risk conceding a goal when trying to score, , move up, can’t concede, fall back, gotta score, attack, can’t concede, defend, gotta score……….. aaaaahhhhhhh can you feel the tensioned excitement!

But wouldn't that result in gentlemen’s agreements between teams to make sure they get a point, I hear some cry. Really, would you trust them to let you score after they had, every team would want to score first, and any way win is always better!

Fans love goals, I think, pure and simple. How many fans after a few wee half lemonades reminisce about that great goalless draw! Football's great memories nearly always involve a goal or two! Think about a half time score of one-all. Both teams have a point, but another goal each could be two points, another couple of goals each and we could have great game on our hands.

There is no denying our game needs stirred up in to the perfect sporting cocktail, but maybe we should listen to Mr Bond and have it shaken not stirred.